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lyrics

oh steve, I can’t replace you
and I could never erase you from my brain
all I wanted was to suffer with you
but that I guess got misconstrued

make it easier for me today
I don’t care what you don’t have to say
it’s not fair for you to just leave me here
I’m just waiting for dust that won’t clear

I’m still waiting for you to come through
but I know that it won’t be real soon
take it easier for me and you

it takes everything I have not to call you
all my emails and texts just suspended in “what happens next?”
and I’m making it harder on everyone smarter than me
I repeat myself day after day

tell me, what is it like without me?
is it everything you thought it would be?
is it easier or do you feel free?

your essence is fire and I miss your lavender touch
and rosewater doesn’t seem much
whenever I hear your name
I sweat and I gasp alone
it rings in my ears every hour, but god
I couldn’t even put it in this song

I’ve given all that I have in me
I just wish that you had more for me

credits

from (terrified and) bare demos, released July 30, 2021

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courtlyn louise New Jersey

courtlyn louise (she/they) is a queer singer/songwriter and musician. armed with a baritone ukulele, their music and vocal style draw influence from folk, alt-rock, and contemporary musical theatre, combining conversational and metaphorical lyrics with flavorful chords and dynamic melodies 🌿

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